iBelieve

Immediately the boy’s father exclaimed, “I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!” Mark 9:24

Archive for the category “Awareness”

The Coffee Bean


Follow me to the fragrance section at the department store. There we will smell a variety of florals, some soapy scents, and some woodsy scents. After a few sniffs, we will need to pick up a little jar of coffee beans and sniff them too to clear our sense of smell in order to keep on testing the aromas. As we continue to go through the plethora of scents, not all of them are pleasing. We sniff the coffee beans intermittently as we make our way down to the end of the fragrance counter.

There are scents we are drawn to and could smell all day and there are some scents that make our nose hairs recoil. Usually the offensive scents are the ones hardest to forget for some reason. This makes us thankful for the coffee bean.

Life is like the fragrance section at the department store. We encounter people, places, and things in which we would love to be in the midst of forever. For me, my husband and our cats, family, cousins, friends, and work associates (past and present) come to mind quickly when I think of people. Places include memories of my family cottage while growing up, my current home, the church building on Sunday, and silent directed retreats that I attend at least once a year. As for things, I love my Bible and currently the internet game, Wordle. My sewing machines are very important to me and my sanity as well.

Life is like the fragrance section at the department store full of the things that are too strong and unpleasant to the senses. Top of the list for me is the violence and vulgarity in movies. Our society has become desensitized to such violence and filth and I choose not to watch such things or encourage them either. My heart breaks for the kids that are confused about their gender. God created us in His image and in the Bible it states that He created male and female and said it was good. I believe satan is the father of lies and he is running loose encouraging confusion, family division, and hatred, all of which top the news cycle every day.

I bring the fragrances of life to God and thank him for the pleasantries. I also lay at his feet my grief and concern for the state of the world; all the things that are too strong and unpleasant. God responds, “Follow me and let me be your coffee bean.”

My faith hits the reset button, and I can continue on.

Therefore, brothers and sisters, since we have confidence to enter the Most Holy Place by the blood of Jesus, by a new and living way opened for us through the curtain, that is, his body, and since we have a great priest over the house of God, let us draw near to God with a sincere heart and with the full assurance that faith brings, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water. Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another —and all the more as you see the Day approaching. Hebrews 10:19-25

Flaws and All


I saw a quote from Augusten Burroughs on Facebook today that read, “I like flaws and feel more comfortable around people who have them. I myself am made entirely of flaws, stitched together with good intentions.”

Around the time I first met my husband, I had a cold sore on my lip. I started getting them one summer from too much sun a few years prior to meeting him. It is hard to flirt with someone when you have a very noticeable defect oozing out of your bottom lip. Trying not to make a big deal of how awkward I felt as we made small talk, I simply pointed to my lip and said, “I’m human” and cut the conversation shorter than I would have liked.

Have you ever been around people that seem to have a too perfect of life? I am not one to verbally judge, but I do have some questions in my mind when I come across this type of person. I most wonder how much energy they expend to keep up a spotless facade? When they get home behind closed doors, do they deflate like a used balloon? Does a woman take a bobby pin out of her sleek hairdo and it poofs out all messy like in a cartoon? I just wonder.

I am attracted to people that are flawed and can admit it. Don’t puff up like a beautiful peacock only to have that be a costume? Be yourself. Be real. We will have more in common with others if we can drop our facades. God intended the human race to live the good life. He made Adam and Eve flawless in the garden until that one day they ate from the forbidden tree. That was the moment humans became flawed, but God did not give up on us.

As we close out day two of Lent, let us remember that we are all flawed and it is okay. Jesus, our Savior, was human and he understands us more than we understand ourselves. Remember, he looks at our hearts and knows our intentions and he still loves us.

Show me your flaws and I will surely show you mine.

2 Corinthians 12:9 New International Version

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.

Just a Glimpse


I have something in common with a pregnant woman and an ultrasound. Read on to find out.

Most expectant mothers look forward to their ultrasound appointment. Valuable information is processed during this exam. Depending on the timing and type of ultrasound (2-D, 3-D, or 4-D) the doctor can evaluate size, weight and health of the unborn baby. They can also tell if there are multiple babies in the womb. The mother leaves the appointment with her baby’s first picture. What a treasure to be able to get a sneak peek of the contents of the womb. Gender is identified if it presents itself. Some like to keep it a secret and be surprised at the birth while others give the information to a loved one who plans a gender reveal party.

The ultrasound is a glimpse of what is to come.

So where do I fit in?

I recently had foot surgery. I am home from work for a couple of weeks and unable to drive. I have not been outside the house for more than a week and my only interaction with people is either through phone calls, email, FaceTime, text messages, or Facebook. The one person I see daily is my husband.

A while ago, I subscribed to the United States Postal Service (USPS) informed delivery service. This service is like an ultrasound of my mailbox. Each morning I get an email showing me images of the mail I am to expect waiting for me in my mailbox. I have seen cards addressed to me, and often who they are from, but I do not know how big the envelope is or the contents inside the envelope. I can only see that someone was thinking of me. I can choose to not open the email in the morning so I can be surprised when I open the mailbox and have my own personal mailbox reveal party.

Getting a peek into the unknown is rather exciting. I am cherishing the sentiments from friends just as much as a mother-to-be holds onto the first picture of their unborn baby/babies.

John 1:1 The Word Became Flesh

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.

Late Night Visitor – Left Behind


I haven’t been writing during Covid. With limited interaction with other people for a year, I did not want my blog to give voice to a pandemic that took away so much for so many. But I had to write today to let you in on a little secret.

Last weekend was Mother’s Day. I have no idea why, but nothing pushed my buttons to trigger the grief of childlessness or the reality of being an orphan. Sure I miss my mom immensely, but I have thanked God numerous times over for calling her home when he did in 2019 before all the pandemic craziness happened. I am not sure how caring for her the way my family did would have been possible. So once again, “Thank you, God!!”

The secret, then, and I feel like whispering, is that I looked around my house and realized grief is gone. Without thinking about it, I cleaned and rearranged the room he was in and I saw one of his favorite sweatshirts lying across the back of a chair. I have this weird intuition about this sweatshirt though.

Have you ever been in a relationship that just wasn’t working out? One person pines after the other and it gets to be annoying. The annoying one finds every excuse to return if only to get a glimpse of the one whom they so desperately want to spend their life. One excuse is to leave behind something important to them, like this sweatshirt, for example. My intuition tells me that grief may show up to get the sweatshirt.

Maybe it isn’t really intuition, but reality that reminds me grief could be back at any time. However, for now, I am enjoying the freedom from grief while I have the chance.

I started a new hobby; quilting. It keeps my mind occupied with creativity and learning something new. I would love to show my mom some of the things I have been creating, but have a feeling she has been around in my quiet times observing my creations and the gifts God gave me. As for the childlessness and quilting, I would love to give to my own kids or grandkids quilts sewn together, every fabric pull to match their personality and every stitch with them in mind, but instead I gift family and friends with the same intentions.

Giving may just be what turned grief away. I like this revelation.

Flowers appear on the earth; the season of singing has come, the cooing of doves is heard in our land.
Song of Songs 2:12

The Traveling Banana


I have good intentions, but those good intentions are only good if acted upon. Read more…

A Season to Plant


I have grown impatient. Read more…

What Do You Want Me To Do For You?


This weekend, while on a silent retreat, Read more…

Knock, Knock


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The One About Impairment


Take a moment to think about an impairment you have experienced, are currently experiencing, or know is coming.   Read more…

Sheeple


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